when things don’t go as planned
I met with my surgeon today to talk about my upcoming surgery and set a date. The plan was I was going to have a double mastectomy as well as have some of my lymph nodes on the left side removed. Being brca1 positive means I have a really high chance of getting breast cancer again, so I wanted that risk gone. My recent hospital stay showed that my heart is really not doing that well, and my surgeon is worried about how it will handle surgery. She thinks the risk to my heart from a double mastectomy is greater than the risk of getting breast cancer again, so for now we are doing a mastectomy on the left (tumour) side, and if I handle it well I can have the other breast removed later.
I’m really upset. Not just because this means two surgeries instead of one, or possibly only one and getting breast cancer again, but because I’ve had heart issues for years. I saw a cardiologist when I was 12 who said it was nothing and to monitor it every few years. I’ve been seeing my current cardiologist for around 12 years and it was more of the same. Once a year I’d get an echocardiogram and occasionally a holter monitor or MRI, and he acted like it was no big deal. For the past several years when my ejection fraction showed lower than normal he’d say sometimes the number was higher, sometimes lower, and we really didn’t know which test to trust, but nothing else really changed, so let’s re-test next year. Only now, after having my second son and an echo that showed an ejection fraction of 38, is it a problem. Only now is he doing something about it (medication that may help), because I demanded he see me before I started chemo and my GP got his secretary to squeeze me in. Still, when I mentioned I had read that an ejection fraction of 35 is categorized as heart failure, he argued that that’s not necessarily true and many people are completely fine with low ejection fractions. I wonder if I had switched cardiologists, or pushed the issue with him, if I wouldn’t be dealing with hospital stays, fluid in my lungs, and surgeons who are worried about my heart tolerating half of what we had originally planned.
I’ve had a cold since leaving the hospital and a productive cough, so I’m pushing my last chemo session from this Friday to the next. My dose will also be 25% lower, so I’m hoping I tolerate it much better. Cancer sucks.
I’m really upset. Not just because this means two surgeries instead of one, or possibly only one and getting breast cancer again, but because I’ve had heart issues for years. I saw a cardiologist when I was 12 who said it was nothing and to monitor it every few years. I’ve been seeing my current cardiologist for around 12 years and it was more of the same. Once a year I’d get an echocardiogram and occasionally a holter monitor or MRI, and he acted like it was no big deal. For the past several years when my ejection fraction showed lower than normal he’d say sometimes the number was higher, sometimes lower, and we really didn’t know which test to trust, but nothing else really changed, so let’s re-test next year. Only now, after having my second son and an echo that showed an ejection fraction of 38, is it a problem. Only now is he doing something about it (medication that may help), because I demanded he see me before I started chemo and my GP got his secretary to squeeze me in. Still, when I mentioned I had read that an ejection fraction of 35 is categorized as heart failure, he argued that that’s not necessarily true and many people are completely fine with low ejection fractions. I wonder if I had switched cardiologists, or pushed the issue with him, if I wouldn’t be dealing with hospital stays, fluid in my lungs, and surgeons who are worried about my heart tolerating half of what we had originally planned.
I’ve had a cold since leaving the hospital and a productive cough, so I’m pushing my last chemo session from this Friday to the next. My dose will also be 25% lower, so I’m hoping I tolerate it much better. Cancer sucks.
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